Take two for Carly

I know that Alberto, the hippie guy who lives in his own imagination, who has longer nails than most women and carries a Barbie doll around on a stick, is perfect for mocking. I realize that for most people, he was the funniest audition, worth writing about. But for me, it was all a little ridiculous and so I'm going to blow right past him.

So 16-year-old David Archuleta is boooring. His story is interesting - he had vocal paralysis and he had trouble talking for a while - but the way he tells it is really dull and by the end of it, I'm left not really caring. But I tell you what - his voice is actually kind of nice. It's smooth and soft and quite pleasant. He blew it a little by forgetting the words, but then he really gets going and by the end, it's really, really good. He even has Randy helping him out with a little background. He makes it through, with a yes from all three judges. I don't think he'll make it past Hollywood, but you never know... Hollywood week is always surprising.

The last audition is saved for Carly Smithson, who is originally from Ireland and whose husband has like a gazillion tattoos. She tried out for Season 5 and made it through to Hollywood, but her visa didn't come through in time and she was disqualified, so now she's back to try out again. She's very good - a little too many notes for my taste, but that's what people used to say about Mozart, so who am I to judge?

Well, right off the bat, Simon tells her it wasn't as good as two years ago and her eyes just about bug out of her head. But she gets a yes from all three judges, and she's finally going to Hollywood.

And that's it for San Diego - 31 people made it through and tomorrow, we move on to Charleston, S.C.

I hate to be disloyal, but...

I'm starting to get a little tired, so I was thinking I'd skip the next couple of people and just watch the show a bit, without having to type. But this Samantha Musa chick shows up with her sister all obsessed with Simon and I'm intrigued. She actually thinks he's hot and is very excited to meet him. Her sister actually gets to sit in on the audition, in Simon's chair wih him, and I'm half expecting her to be awful, since the whole bit has been kind of ridiculous so far, but she's really, really great, and so the audition takes a turn for me. I can put aside her weird taste in men for a minute, because I want to hear more. She sings Aretha Franklin, but she has this very cool kind of country sound. Very interesting take on the song - not at all what I expected. And as she goes on, it's not just the country thing that I like - her voice is very clear, and you can tell that if she wants to, she can put some real power behind it. I like her - probably one of my favorites so far. And she makes it through. The obsession with Simon is really weird though. I hope she gets over that before the finals.

Just another reason I hate Long Beach. No, not Long Beach, Calif., which would make sense, since the audition is in California. I mean Long Beach, NY. Besides the fact that there's only like two ways to get there, that there's never any parking, that the cops there are ticket-happy and that it's really, really far from my house, it turns out that Blake Boshnack is from Long Beach.

I'm not going to be terribly mean to him, mostly because he's a fellow Long Islander, but also because it's actually kind of sweet that he and his mom share this dream to be on the show, and it's actually really touching to see a mom so willing to take her son across the country to pursue it. But, I have to say... you've tried out 10 times - they've said no 10 times - the time you showed up in a Statue of Liberty costume, they barely even let you sing. At what point do you start to get the message that this is not going to happen for you?

It turns out even 11 rejections won't do it. Even though they say no, he leaves saying he plans to continue trying out. Oh boy.

Birds of a feather... go crazy together

So Monique Gibson and Christopher Baker go to the auditions together and they both think they can make it to the top. Monique is up first and the first thing Simon tells her is that it looks like three different people helped her get dressed. I didn't think her outfit was that bad - the little bootie things she has on are horrible, but besides that and the fact that, overall, the outfit isn't very flattering to her figure, I thought she looked OK.

Oh boy - she's going to sing Whitney Houston's "I Believe In Miracles." She must believe in miracles if she really thinks she's going to be able to sing that song anywhere near as good as Whitney Houston. Simon even tries to give her an out by saying, "You really think you can sing that song?" But she says she thinks she can and so they tell her to go on. She doesn't even get past the first line before Randy starts laughing. After the second line, with Randy still laughing, she pauses a little, kind of annoyed, but clearly doesn't accept that he's laughing because she's bad, and she continues to sing.

They tell her it's not going to happen, and she keeps smiling, not really accepting it, and she even tries two other songs, saying, "There's gotta be something." and they're like, "No, there's nothing." When it hits her that they're telling her no, the smile disappears and is quickly replaced with tears. She tells them she went through so much trying to get there and she knows she can sing. Simon tells her there's nothing wrong with leaving the room knowing she can't sing, but she won't listen to that. She insists that she can sing and that perhaps she picked the wrong song. She leaves the room crying and says in her interview that she's hurt and she just hopes her friend makes it.

That's right - it's not over yet.


Christopher Baker is next, and he, too, is crazy enough to believe he can sing Whitney Houston - he chooses "The Greatest Love of All." I feel like I should say something complimentary here - but I really just can't. He was really out of tune for most of it, and the worst part is that he was practically yelling the song. They try to get him to stop, but he keeps going - I wonder if maybe he just couldn't hear them over his yelling. Simon asks him if that sounded good to him and Christopher responds, "Yes it did, sir." Well, he's very polite - I'll give him that.

Simon tells him that not a single note was in tune, and Christopher's response is to break into another song. This one is so bad, Paula can't keep from laughing. Simon then tells him that no one would ever pay to hear him sing and he says he understands and that he'll sing in a different tone. He tries again, this time softer, and it's better, in my opinion, but still a little out of tune. They tell him no again, and he starts another song. They finally get security to take him out.

And then, of course, the two friends, reunited and freshly rejected, do the obligatory cursing out of the camera and they add in a little bit of theirs ABCs. Nutty.

Let's call this her "Glitter" moment

Wow... ok. Valerie Reyes has disaster written all over her. Let me tell you why...

She loves Mariah Carey.

Now, before I get anyone upset with me, I am not bashing Mariah Carey. She has a beautiful voice, one of the best, probably, and has proven that she can sell millions of records. However, here's my problem with people who love Mariah Carey. They think they can sing like Mariah Carey. They think they can sing all the runs, high and low, just like Mariah and sadly, no one in the world, except maybe Christina Aguilera can sing those crazy runs like Mariah Carey can.

I was actually a little surprised that Valerie didn't choose a Mariah song for her audition - she does Phil Collins instead. But it's like she doesn't realize it - she sings the song as if she was channeling Mariah anyway - she attempts to add silly little runs to the song and it sounds like the same note, just shaky... she tries to make her voice gravelly in spots and it sounds like her voice is cracking instead. But the piece de resistance - she tries to hit the super high notes that only Mariah can hit and she sounds like a wounded animal. It's almost funny how obviously she tried to copy Mariah - I'm sure somewhere in the world, Mariah is terribly flattered. Whatever.

But Randy brings up a good point. He tells her she's terrible, which she was, but that's not it. He also says that she actually has a good tone to her voice and that if she stopped trying to sing like Mariah and instead tried to focus on a melody, she might actually be a good singer. I think he's right - it's not like she was out of tune - she was just making weird noises from trying to mimic a style that really only one or two people in the world can pull off. Anyway, they tell her no and she actually seems surprised, and it's not until her interview afterward that she realizes that she's going to be on the rejects show.

Off to a good start

So this is the first time "American Idol" has held auditions in San Diego, so there's no telling what will come up in tonight's episode. Could be a city of untapped talent or could be an hour of just crazy duds.

First up is Tetiana Ostapowych, 24, of Venice, Calif., who walks in all confident, doesn't seem very nervous. She says she's so excited, but really seems very calm and collected. She says she's going to sing "Someone to Watch Over Me," and does a very good job, I think. I will say that she sounds like a lot of other singers - and I wonder if they plan to add anyone really different to this year's group of finalists. This girl is cute and she can sing, but there's nothing that really sets her apart from anyone else - at least not from what they're showing us. Simon tells her that she's not as good as she thinks she is. He even goes on to say that he doesn't think she's ever going to be great. But he says yes to her anyway, as do Paula and Randy, so we'll be seeing more of her soon enough.

Those of you who have read this blog in the past and have noticed that I tend to fall for the sappy life stories should already know that I love single father Perrie Cataldo, who traveled from Arizona. They did this cute little intro with his son, Avian, saying that his papi is the next American Idol. And we quickly learn that the little boy's mother died in 2005 - they don't say how she died, but he does say that she was mixed up in the wrong crowd. But he talks about how he's matured since her passing, and how he wants to provide his son with the childhood he never had. It wasn't a crazy tear-jerker story, but it was moving to see a young man dedicated to raising his son, so I hope he makes it through.

Here's my take on Perrie. His voice is good - his tone is good. You could hear how nervous he was, which threw him off key a bit and it seemed a little like he was trying too hard to copy Boys II Men, instead of singing in his own voice, his own style. But I think he can improve - I think he could surprise people if he's given the chance.

I'm a little taken aback that Simon didn't nitpick him - instead he tells him that he has a really really good voice and all three judges say yes. Welcome to Hollywood, baby!!